Monday, April 9, 2012

The Hot Sexy Mama Blues...

    I consider myself to be a very sexy and attractive young woman. Ok, I’ll go beyond that…I’m fucking hot!
    I always imagined myself being the sexy housewife cooking dinner in heels and nothing else. He would come home from work and just take me there bent over in the kitchen.

     Just the thought of it turned me on.

What I didn’t factor into that equation: kids

Mother-fucking KIDS!

Once I became an actual housewife, my husband still thought that shit was going to fly.

He wasn’t too happy when I laughed in his face.

We can barely have sex in our own bed let alone the kitchen.

Before we had kids, he would come home and I would be ready for him naked with my ass in the air, but now…I hate to admit…sometimes I barely make it out of my pajamas.

Yet, It is hard to play and look the part when I spend all day trying to write what I can and keep the two little rug rats from killing each other. By the time my husband gets home…the only thing I want to do is take a nap.

That does not mean that I don’t get horny. Most of the time it is when my husband is at work. For some reason Noon is my prime to get fucked (I wonder if that statement will produce men to be at my door for lunch?)

 Recently, I confessed that I sometimes sneak away from my kids and hide in the closet to…pleasure myself or most importantly to have some time to myself. Sometimes you just need the time alone to just clear your head.

Making the decision to quit my job and write and stay home with the kids was a rather difficult decision.  I mean, I really loved my job. Yet, I had an opportunity to do something I have been writing to do my entire life. Stay home and take care of my kids myself and write.

Because I quit, it gave me time and opportunity to finish my first erotic romance novel and spend some quality time with my kids.

Now, I love my kids to death, they are the cutest little girls on the earth. But I tell you they make mommy want to pull out her hair.  I didn’t realize that a child could ask so many questions in a minute. Nor have I ever imagined that kids could injury themselves so much.

Some days I wish that I had my cubicle back. I want to go to work and have just one minute or one second to just clear my head. I love being a stay-at-home mom, but sometimes I yearn for adult interaction.

My 4 year old little diva (aka My Shadow) is a freaking or future thief.  She made a key to unlock my bedroom door using one of her toys. No joke. If she can’t find me she goes crazy and has recently discovered my hiding place.

The 1 year old is the worse. Her sole mission in life is to destroy. It doesn’t matter what she comes in contact with. I have actually witnessed her steal my husbands wallet and proceed to eat everything inside.

I feel like I should be wearing a hard hat some days. Good thing I have one on hand (If you want to know why I have one, just think role playing and the sexy construction worker ;-) )  

As, I write this I am watching my 1 year old on the corner of my eye trying to eat my smart phone. 

On the other side my husband is looking at me. I know what he wants. He wants me to put our little queen of destruction here to bed so we can be alone.

I hate to tell him that by the time I put this little “angel” to sleep…I’ll probably be asleep right along side her.